Friendship & Social Skills
One of the biggest parts of preschool goes beyonnd knowing letters, numbers, shapes, or colors. It’s learning how to be a friend.
For many children, preschool is one of their first experiences regularly being in a group of kids their own age without a parent right beside them. They’re learning how to share toys, wait for turns, join a group, communicate what they want, listen to someone else, handle frustration, and work through disagreements.
Those are BIG skills for little kids!
And just like we don’t expect a child to walk into preschool already knowing every letter and number, I don’t expect them to walk in having completely mastered their social skills either. That’s part of what preschool is for.
We Practice Being a Friend
Social skills are something we intentionally work on throughout our preschool day.
We practice things like:
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Sharing and taking turns
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Using kind words
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Asking someone to play
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Including others
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Listening to our friends
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Keeping our hands and bodies safe
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Recognizing and talking about our emotions
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Communicating when we don’t like something
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Being patient
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Apologizing and making things right
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Solving problems together
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Calming our bodies when we’re upset
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Celebrating and encouraging our friends
Some of these things happen through songs, stories, activities, conversations, and lessons. But honestly, some of the BEST opportunities to learn them happen naturally while the kids are playing together.
What Happens When Kids Don't Get Along?
They’re preschoolers—so sometimes they won’t! And that is okay.
There will inevitably be moments when two children want the same toy. Someone may grab something. Someone might get frustrated and push, poke, or grab another child. Feelings might get hurt. Someone may not want to share. A child might say something that isn’t very kind.
Of course, those aren’t behaviors that I ignore or allow in our classroom. But I also don’t view every disagreement between preschoolers as a sign that something is terribly wrong.
Instead, I view those moments as opportunities to teach.
If two children are fighting over a toy, I can step in and help them figure out how to take turns. If a child pushes because they’re frustrated, we can talk about why we don’t use our hands to solve problems and practice what they can say or do instead. If someone’s feelings are hurt, we can talk about how our actions affect our friends and how we can make things right.
Sometimes we even turn something that happened into a lesson, story, song, or activity for the whole class so everyone gets another chance to practice that skill.
The goal isn’t to have a classroom where children never make mistakes. The goal is to have a classroom where those mistakes are met with guidance, boundaries, and opportunities to learn something better.
Learning What to Say
One thing I really want children to develop is the ability to use their own voices.
Instead of only having an adult solve every problem for them, we practice simple things they can actually say to one another:
“Can I have a turn when you’re done?”
“I’m still playing with that.”
“Please stop.”
“I don’t like that.”
“Can I play too?”
“Can we share?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Are you okay?”
These seem like such little phrases, but learning how to communicate what they need, advocate for themselves, listen to another child, and solve small problems is a huge part of becoming more independent and being ready for kindergarten.
I will always be there to help and step in when needed, but my hope is that over time, they begin using these skills on their own.
Practice, Practice, Practice
Learning social skills takes repetition.
We would never teach a child the letter A once and then be concerned if they didn’t remember it perfectly forever. Social and emotional skills work the same way.
A child might need to be reminded many times to wait for a turn.
They may know that we don’t grab toys and then get excited and grab one anyway.
They might know exactly what to say when someone frustrates them and completely forget it in the moment.
That doesn’t mean they aren’t learning. It means they’re little!
My job is to continue teaching, modeling, reminding, redirecting, and giving them opportunities to practice. Over time, those little moments add up.
A Safe Place to Learn
I want Little Explorers to be a place where every child feels safe, loved, seen, and valued.
Part of creating that environment is keeping a close eye on the children while also understanding that even with attentive supervision, I cannot promise that another preschooler will never grab a toy, push, poke, hurt someone’s feelings, or make a poor choice.
What I can promise is that I take those moments seriously when I see them, intervene when needed, comfort children who are hurt, reinforce our classroom expectations, and help the children learn a better way to handle the situation next time.
There is also a difference between normal preschool conflict and an ongoing safety concern.
Occasional disagreements, impulsive behaviors, and struggles with sharing are very normal things that we will work through together. However, if a child is repeatedly hurting other children, causing consistent injuries, or displaying behavior that is creating an unsafe environment for the class, that becomes a different conversation. I will communicate with parents and work together to determine what support or changes are needed.
The safety and well-being of every child in my classroom will always matter to me.
We're Learning Together
Some children naturally jump right into a group and make friends everywhere they go.
Others need a little more time. Some children are wonderful sharers but struggle when they’re frustrated. Others communicate beautifully but are still learning patience.
Every child comes into preschool at a different place socially, emotionally, and academically—and that’s okay.
My goal isn’t to create perfect preschoolers. ❤️
My goal is to give them a safe place to practice.
I want them to leave Little Explorers knowing a little more about how to be kind, how to communicate, how to work through hard feelings, how to solve problems, how to stand up for themselves appropriately, and how to be a good friend.
Because those skills will matter long after they’ve learned their ABCs.